Growing and Learning

I had a thought before my mission as I was walking into the AP Calculus Test my senior year of high school. It was: Everything that I have learned over the past year has been leading up to this moment. Every assignment, every test, every day of class, they were all preparing me for the roughly three hours that I would take this test. I took the test, and all that time paid off, I passed. Later, I was thinking about this idea, and I realized I was shortchanging myself. I had been preparing for this test since Kindergarten, and and in all reality before that. From learning 1+1=2 to that AP test, I had been preparing, even though at that time I could have had no idea what it was this path would eventually lead too.

I would like to share about my personal conversion to the Gospel in light of this story. I am going to gloss over details, and hopefully in other posts go in to more depth with them, but for now we are going to look at an overall picture. I was raised in a LDS home, with my parents taking me actively to church. We held regular Family Home Evening Monday nights and family scripture study in the morning with my Mom dragging us kicking and screaming some of the time. Church was so much a part of my life, my neighbors were all "Brother" and "Sister" instead of Mr. and Miss. When I was about 14, I started having doubts. I started wondering why I was wasting my time with church. I decided to find out for myself whether the church was true or not, and started reading The Book of Mormon. I found out it was true, and it was amazing. I actively  attended seminary over the next four years and felt the Spirit often in those classes. I graduated high school and the next step in life was to go on a mission.

I was excited when I submitted my papers, and unlike most people I ask, I had a couple of places I wanted to go. My older brother was at the time serving his mission in the London, England Mission, and my Dad served his mission in the Scotland Mission. I felt confident that, given these facts, I was going to the English Island. My second pick would have been to go to South America. I got my call: Arkansas, Little Rock Mission. English Speaking.

I was not happy. I did not want to go to Arkansas. I didn't even know where Arkansas was!

When you get your mission call, among all the forms is one you send back as an acceptance letter. I was temped to say something a little like this: "I accept this call, but are you sure this is the right one? Maybe you confused me with another Tyler Allen, because I'm pretty sure I am not suppose to go to Arkansas." I didn't, I just said something like, "I'm happy to serve here." Inside I was not sure this would be for me and I can say with confidence if what happened next had not happened, I would have come home from my mission early.

I went to the temple and I prayed about it, and I got the answer that God had not messed up, and the Arkansas, Little Rock Mission was the mission I was meant to go to. I went on my mission, and it was the hardest experience of my life, but I would not have it any other way.

My faith has grown a whole lot since I was 14, and I am so happy it has.

Now, if you were to go back and show little 14 year old me everything that was going to happen to me in the next 8 years, I would not have believed I could do it. And at 14 I couldn't do it, but I grew into it, in the same way I could not do Calculus in Kindergarten, but I can now.